020221

 020221

I have started working for my Panama job since last week, and I am getting more and more used to the time difference. Not very enjoyable, of course, because the biological clock was set in certain way and now I am forcing it to rewind, sort of speak. I have noticed that, lately, I have become more and more impatient to Andres, and I think it has something to do with my sleep schedule changes. Or maybe not. I am still mad about him not showing willingness to quit smoking. This afternoon we went to the hospital for an appointment with the Chief Surgeon and he told my dad that in his coloscopy they discovered polyps and they were able to remove them and got some testing done, the results showed that they were benign. His heart is working well. He seemed to be in good condition physically. I asked the doc if I could do MRI and CT in Panama and send the images to him, to such suggestion he recommended me not to, because I will be wasting money. The Mackay Hospital will have to do them again when I get back to TW for precision sake.

I got myself a little snack on the way back to LK, of course it's KETO friendly (lol I hope so). I feel a bit depressed because I know that I should not be angry at Andres; instead, I should honor and love him the way Bible teaches, but such notion is, to say the least, so disgusting to me. He literally disgusts me, it's like a piece of crap sticking to your skin and you can't wipe it off kind of feeling. I really want to be blessed by God by following His commands and enjoy the peace and joy in the Lord, but I have to deal with this sin of not loving my own father. When I come to think about all these things, of liver transplantation, medical expenses, being separated from my pregnant wife and toddler son, losing weight to cure my fatty liver, going through all the hassles to get NHI...etc, I asked myself: are they worth the cost? Who screwed up his own liver by drinking till pants fell off? Who started to smoke since the age of of 15? Who had an affair and ended up with a daughter out of wedlock? And the last question is: who is paying for all these? God of mercy please comfort my soul. 


Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

020421

Image
 020421 I had to go to the Carrefour of Tian Mu where I worked for two days as janitor/cleaner, to fill out some paperwork so  they could pay me my wage. On the way to the megastore I saw the bus for blood donation, so an idea occurred to me: why not? I have always wanted to donate my vital liquid but after my last experience in Panama, which was traumatic, I put it to the back of my mind. The problem is that I have this kind of weird vein,  I think they called it "rolling vein", and the technician/nurse at CSS of Transistmica sucked at finding it. I remembered when I was in CSS I could not fill the bag after half an hour of "working hard" and the blood coagulated so it was all wasted. The worse thing was that when they removed the needle they did not do it right so my blood pressure changed suddenly, and I became dizzy and fainted. The docs had to come and rescue me by lifting my legs above my head. To put it simply: it was a horrible experience at CSS, yes the one...
Read more

021321

Image
So I woke up early in the morning trying to make sure I 'd get to the airport on time. I had the plan few days ago to ride the U-bike to the metro station of LK and then take the train to the airport. So I woke up around six and took a bus and the bus took me to the metro MRT. Things were going fine so far, and I was so excited because very soon I will be able to see my beloved wife and son. I am struggling to teach myself, which one I should love more: Ruth or Josiah? The Bible says that I should be united with my wife as one flesh.  So I got to the airport and the people at the check- in said that I am not allowed to go to Canada because they have a lock-down. I was like, what?! I tried to talk to them, asking them to change my flight, telling them to pull up their pants and find me a solution. They were like: deal with it yourself. I talked to the supervisor, the guy said that: we could send you to SFO then you are on your own. I was able to change my route buy using United APP ...
Read more

021621

Image
I am going to finish yesterday's post. I got to PTY and went through the customer quite fast. They saw my Covid exam paper and let me through without asking me a question. I went out the airport and took a bus to the nearest Metro station, I think the one of Corredor Sur. I rode the train to NVO Tocumen and got picked up by mom, Ruth, my sister and yes, Josiah! I much I longed to hug him and tell him I loved him. I don't know if it is biblically appropriate to say he is the apple of my eyes. I love him with all my heart. It troubles me a little when I have to think about leaving my family behind to go to TW to take care of my father. Donating my liver to a person who had chosen to live with a lifestyle that was harmful to himself and his family. He pretty much destroyed his family because of his bad decision. Now I am trying to clean up his mess and I have to pay a high price to do it. I don't want to say this because it makes me sound like  a wimp, but it's totally unc...
Read more